So many times I’ve seen parents or caregivers in a frantic search for a missing child.  It can be difficult on those busy weekends when you’re distracted in thought or conversation, or thinking the other parent is keeping tabs on little Olivia while you chase Monroe, but it turns out Olivia is nowhere to be found because the other parent had assumed YOU were keeping an eye on Olivia!

I know how easily one can get distracted.  A few years ago I was at the park with two little ones.  The oldest was about 18 months at the time, and the youngest was just a few months old.  I was feeding the baby her bottle, but made the milk too hot-so I began pouring the milk between two bottles trying to cool it down.  Meanwhile the oldest child was running around, and I was doing my best to keep tabs on her, but not consistently.  So after a couple for minutes of feeding the baby, I looked up and Sarah was gone.  Completely vanished.  She was JUST there not more than 3 minutes ago, but now was nowhere to be found.  I felt as if my heart dropped to the ground and this horrible sense of terror rushed through my body.

I jumped up with the baby still in my arms, bottle still in her mouth and on the verge of tears, I began searching for her big sister.  I called her name and nothing, well not nothing, by now the baby was screaming her head off from hunger, which just made my frenzy all the worse! After what seemed to be a lifetime, but probably about 2-3 minutes I heard a tiny voice from above, “Mari, what’s wrong?” And there was Sarah who had climbed up to the top of the slide, playing with her (imaginary) friend Jack.

After the relief set in, we went back to playing.  But man, those were the longest 3 minutes of my life! I’ve never been so scared.  After that incident, I made sure that Sarah was close to me if I had to feed the baby. I made this “snack time”, which just made visits to the park so much easier, especially with a toddler and a newborn.  Man, those were some crazy days!!

It always infuriates me when I see a Nanny on the phone at the park ignoring the children they are supposed to be watching. Sometimes the park is like a Nanny meetup; they all sit around the same bench chatting up a storm while the kids are left more or less on their own.

One time I watched two little ones up and leave the park while their nanny was distracted on her cell phone. I kept an eye on them but still, their Nanny shouldn’t have been distracted like that. After realizing her children were missing, she became a frantic mess, so I directed the children back towards the park. Once the Nanny spotted them it looked like she was going to pass out from relief.  It’s just too easy to lose sight of a child while distracted…best to leave the world behind when visiting a park, because all it takes is a glance away to lose sight of a child.

What I have found works is a “plan of attack” before arriving at the park, swimming pool or mall. If you have multiple caregivers and children, assign a kid to each adult, i.e.: Daddy has Sally and Mike, and Mommy has the baby. Make sure there is an understanding that a verbal confirmation is required if one of you needs to step away or handle something that might distract your attention.

Giving your child some tips on what to do if they find themselves lost is great too.  Once they’re old enough to understand (about age 3 and up) tell them:

• If you find yourself lost or can’t see Mommy and Daddy, just sit right down and wait and we will find you.
• Try to find another Mommy or Daddy and ask if they can help you.
• Always stay nearby to us, so you can always see Mommy and Daddy, even if we’re busy.  If you can see us, than we can see you!